Why I Don’t Get to Complain that I’m Single on Valentine’s Day
I hate it when people say Valentine’s Day is “just a Hallmark holiday” or “just another day.” I want to celebrate it so badly. I’m 33 years old and I have been single for all but two Valentine’s Days in my lifetime…and oh boy do I want to whine about it.
I haven’t been in a real relationship in five and a half years — meaning I haven’t been anyone’s girlfriend since I’ve lived in LA. Every year since my last breakup, this holiday has been torture. Sure, sometimes I’ve pacified my disappointment with friends or fun nights out, but this year hits different. Not only because dating isn’t a thing anymore (I don’t know how anyone does it safely, to be honest), but because my solitude has helped me realize that it’s my own fault that I’m single.
The worst question you can ask a single person is “why are you single?” The reason this is so uncomfortable is because we know we’re partly to blame, but in that moment, it’s usually a question being asked of us as a kind of compliment.
So I figured I’d take a little time to explain exactly why I’m single. This list is not going to help me get a date. This list is not going to help me find the love of my life. But this list is an honest appraisal of why exactly I’m suffering this Valentine’s Day and what exactly I need to do to change it.